Altitude golf, NFL 🤝 PGA, and more...

GM and welcome to the Breakfast Ball Buffet, your daily golf gossip roundup. Because wtf else are you going to do… work? Here’s what’s cooking today ↓

• Altitude golf is nuts 🏔️

• A surprise for Happy Gilmore 2 👀

• NFL + Golf = 🤝

• Buffet bets 🏆

Altitude golf is nuts 🏔️

This week’s BMW Championship is being played at Castle Pines, a ridiculously cool-looking golf course in Colorado that plays ~6,500 feet above sea level.

This is just basic science and every golfer knows this, but golf at altitude is absolutely bonkers.

It’s 8,200 yards on the scorecard, but the in reality it will play less than 7,200 yards adjusted for the altitude, which means it’s one of the shortest setups of the year for these guys.

You hit every club 18-20% longer, and even if you bring your scientific calculator on the course, it’s still somehow impossible to gauge distances.

Expect an abundance of 400 yard drives and a lot of confused-looking players after they air-mail greens.

Gonna be a fun one in the Rockies!

A surprise for Happy Gilmore 2 👀

As we mentioned a few editions ago, us normal people had the chance to audition for Happy Gilmore 2 in New Jersey this week, and the turnout was just as you’d expect ↓

And on the topic of Happy Gilmore 2, this unexpected news dropped today ↓

Unlike the hundreds of people who lined up outside a Hyatt Hotel in NJ, I know damn well that Travis Kelce didn’t have to audition for his role.

I don’t think any of us saw this coming, maybe except for this random guy ↓

Anyways, whether you like him or not, Kelce is both hilarious and a stud. I’m pretty excited to see what role he plays in the sequel.

And in case you were wondering if he could play:

NFL + Golf = 🤝

While we’re on the topic of football and golf converging, we might as well talk about how athletes from all other sports wish they were pro golfers.

To be fair, makes sense. As much as the pros grind like crazy, it’s an amazing lifestyle and pays… quite well.

A few months back we had Jets’ star CB Sauce Gardner all over our X feeds discussing his new golf addiction. Just when you thought he was gonna dial for the upcoming season ↓

The good news for Jets fans is that NFL players sleep in a team hotel on gameday-eves, even before home games. So no late nights in the sim before a 1 PM game against the Dolphins for Sauce!

Up next on NFL players who love golf but suck at it is Peyton Manning. He played in the BMW pro-am yesterday and honestly, I can’t unsee what I unfortunately saw ↓

You’d expect freak athletes to be coordinated enough to at least be semi-decent at the sport but this is… insane.

Buffet bets 🏆

Gonna go out on a limb and say that the altitude factor will make this week even harder to forecast than the rest.

Our picks got crazy hot over the summer but have definitely gone cold over the past few weeks, so do yourself a favor and fade the absolute sh*t out of these ↓

BBB’s winner — Viktor Hovland (+2000): it’s no fun to just take Scottie (or even Xander at this point). So excluding those two, this is one I have a strong feeling about this week. A win would be a title defence, so that’s cool too.

Top-10 lock — Wyndham Clark (+170): the Denver-native hasn’t had his best stuff since his strong start in Jan-Feb, but I can’t think of a more advantageous home-field advantage than knowing how to play altitude golf (btw, the real top-10 lock’s are Scottie and Collin, but this is more fun).

The matchup-lay — Collin over Rory & Ludvig over Tommy (+240): look, I hate to bet against Rory, but what I saw last week was as uninspiring as it gets. And regarding Lud, I have no idea why I’m taking him but I just am.

Must-add tweet of the week:

Quick bites 🥓

Oh Billy: winning the worst soundbite of the week award is Billy Horschel, who said he was more nervous on Sunday at the Tour Championship last year than Sunday at the Open this year. Yikes.

Professor Paddy: here’s a great lesson from 3x major champ Padraig Harrington on the proper transition from backswing to downswing.

Tiger Woods (literally): two months, five days and 30,000 pieces of Oak, Maple, Elm, Walnut, and Hackberry later, you have the coolest golf mural ever.